ok everyone i am really hurt and tore up right now and not sure what to do. i feel totally lost in life, a few months back i had a co worker that was a pretty good friend so i thought untill i found out he stabbed me in my back to the bosses and tried getting me fired. he didnt succeed but tried so needless to say we are not friends. about a month ago i noticed the gf of over 6yrs was treating me different and the "spark" didnt seem to be there from her like it was before. wednesday when we were eating lunch her phone goes off and i look over at it she grabs it turns to the side and deletes the message real quick. we get dome eating and in the car i ask her what that was all about and she goes it was cory (co worker and ex friend) i said um ok y? she goes we still talk on occasion, i said after everything he done and almost cost me my job and our living you still talk to him? she said yea not to much but he is still a friend. i got mad but left it go. this morning i get a message from another girl saying to watch my other friend that him and laurel is talking alot and "all over each other" and as soon as i turn my back he will do things. so now im hot i get on verizon to look at our account, she has been talking to cory in text way more than me, like from the time she wakes till the time she goes to bed when im at work and if im around she still tries but not as much. i also seen she has been talking and texting the other buddy way more then she ever talks to me as well.

she lied to me, betrayed me, back stabbed me. i give her everything she wants and this is the thanks i get. i just dont know what to do at this point. i have no proof of cheating but who knows at this point

im just really hurt right now and dont know what to do

 

My best advise, when you can be calm, talk to her. Just explain what you see going on and why it hurts you. Don't get mad with her. I know based on what you mentioned it should be a "given" that she should understand why these actions upset you, but it could be as simple as she just doesn't see it the same. Plus, if she had a relationship with these people prior to them hurting you, she may still in some manner value those relationships not realizing the scope of how bad these people affected you.

I'm trying to look at this more positive then negative man. It's easy to take circumstantial information and look for the worst, but if you do that, it will guarenteed cost you your relationship with your girlfriend. Don't approach her to put her in a position to defend her self for what she is doing, put her in a position to allow you to understand where her point of view is.

If she is honest with you, the rest will come together.

 

Stuff like this is never easy. Over-reactions can lead to make things worse (like Jason is getting at)

Everyone is an adult. Time to act like one and have a conversation. Don't beat around the bush, just say that she is talking to him more than you feel comfortable. Yes she is entitled to have her own life and her own friends, but if this is more than that, let her tell you now.

Sometimes you don't know until after 6 years that it's better to walk away. That stuff is very tough, but you should always do the right thing.

Take the time to think about it, how you want to word it, and leave the fighting out of it.

 

From what YOU have written, dump her and move on.

This whole grown up, sit down and talk is out the window. She's definitely hiding something and acting like a kid, there's no way an "adult" conversation will resolve anything.

There are plenty of fish in the sea, other fishes that will love to sit on the passenger seat of turbo Monte.

 

I mean i you want brutal honesty, i guess i agree with him.
Child games are for high school, hiding messages and such is hurtful! a girl shouldn't be driving you crazy making you wonder whats going on.

I agree with everyone here,
Sit her down, calmly talk to her see if you can work something out.
if she starts getting pissy and yelling,
its just time to find another passenger in turbo monte.

 

It's somthing tought to go throught and i have been in very familiar shoe's just a year ago.. oddly enought at that pint had been together 6 1/2 years, we where able to resolve our problem and she no longer talks with that person

Try to stay calm, deffiniatly confront her about it but try not to fight about it you both need to sit down and have a conversation and talk about about things yelling gets nowhere!, and honestly you to tell her,

you Are 100% in this relationship, physically, mental and emothionally but if she's not you may need to explore diffenet options,

and if she say she is you need to tell her this needs to stop as with it you feel she is not 100% invested the relationship, and things are going to have to change


honestly you may not get the awncer you want, this may end a long running relationship but sometimes it is for the better,

 

Hi `John,
Sorry to read about your personal problem. I think it's easier to fix a Monte Carlo problem, then it is to fix/repair a human relationship problem.

I firmly believe that `if you don't have two way trust in a relationship, then you don't have anything.

 

Its just time to move on in my opinion. Honesty is everything without that there is no relationship.

 

Sorry to hear this problem..Time to move on ..

 

`amen `Mel & `Jerry
`John, I've learned that we must listen & learn from those that have traveled b-4 `us...

I was taught 2 `Speak true & act your words (I do my best 2 follow my teachings from those I trust with my life)

There just seem to be many that do not speak true in 2days World. I find it very, very sad 4-Real

They promise, but never act on their promises
I always `laugh when someone says to me "Let me be honest with you" or say "2 tell you the truth" ( I think 2 myself, wow ~> they are going to be honest with me ? Does this mean they haven't been honest or told me the truth in the past ? I always find that funny.

John, you know your g/f better then anyone else, & I'm in no position to judge her, that's your decision. Only you know `if she is truthful or not ? Again, I hope things work out 4 you in whatever you decide...Now, to be honest with `ya ... I do wish you Good Luck 4-Sure