lmao!!!! rj that was good

 

Very Tight An 85-year-old man visits his doctor to get a sperm count. The geezer’s given a jar and told to bring back a sample. The next day he returns to the doctor’s office with an empty jar.

“What happened?” says the doc.

“Well,” the old man starts, “I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left—nothing. Then she tried her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with the teeth out, still nothing. We even called in Arlene, the lady next door, but still nothing.”

The doctor bursts out, “You asked your neighbor?”

“Yep. No matter what we tried, we couldn’t get that damn jar open.”[/align]

 

 

[align=center]Warning Adult Theme `Joke[/align][align=center][:-][/align][align=center](The Beach Bum's found this joke : )[/align][align=center]We hope U laugh : )[/align][align=center]It is not posted to offend anyone.[/align][align=center]
Dog Named Mypenis
[/align][align=center][/align][align=center]
[/align][align=center]Tired of boring old dog name like Ruff, Spot, Lassie, etc?
The next time you get a dog, name it: Mypenis
Why, you ask? [/align][align=center]Well just look at some of the great excuses you can use for school, work, and general conversation!

-I did do my homework but Mypenis ate it!
-Oh no, Mypenis is frothing at the mouth!
-Sorry I'm late. I was playing with Mypenis.
-I'm sorry officer, I didn't realize I had to keep Mypenis on a leash.
-Mypenis doesn't come when I call it.
-Mypenis likes to crawl between the legs of guests.
-If Mypenis begs at the dinner table, I just tell it to LAY DOWN!
-I love giving Mypenis a bath, but Mypenis doesn't like cold water.
-At night, I like to snuggle with Mypenis.
-Mypenis likes it when people pet him.
-Mypenis needs to get more exercise. He weighs over fifty pounds!
-Playing with Mypenis really wears me out.
-Would you like to see a picture of Mypenis?
-Sometimes I wake up, and Mypenis is already active.
-I think Mypenis has a mind of its own.
-I keep a picture of Mypenis in my wallet.
-Whenever I get lost, Mypenis points me in the right direction.
-I think Mypenis is getting old because he won't get excited anymore. He just plays dead.
-Mypenis got out last night. I think he's sleeping with the lady next door.
-HELP! Mypenis is lost...can you help me find him?
-Sorry to be driving slow officer, but I was looking for Mypenis.
-Sorry to be driving so fast, officer. I have to take Mypenis to the hospital.
-Mypenis got fleas from the neighbors dog.
-Anytime Mypenis gets too excited, I just scratch him behind the head.
-Please do not feed Mypenis table scraps!
-Do you think you could feed Mypenis while I'm on vacation?
-I have a cat that plays very well with Mypenis. [/align][align=center]
-When I take Mypenis for a ride in my Monte Carlo, I roll down the window so it can hang it's head out.[/align][align=center][/align][align=center] [][/align]

 

Wiz & Space,

Good jokes. (two thumbs up here)




"RJ, what did you tell your girlfriend, when this happened"

Space,
I tried to keep it from her. But the nurse from the ER phoned to ask if I was keeping ice on it. So she found out.

 

lmao!!!!!

 

[align=center][/align][align=center]Ok, where's `My ***** ?[/align][align=center]I know your around here somewhere ?[/align][align=center]Come out & play.....Your Daddy'sHome [/align][align=center]Come out, I have friends coming over, and I want you to[/align][align=center]show them our new tricks....Where's my `***** ?[/align][align=center]Come to me : )[/align][align=center][:-][/align][align=center][/align][align=center][/align][align=center][/align][align=center]Boy, do I have a weird owner : )[/align][align=center][/align][align=center]Bow-WoW[/align]

 

[sm=funnypostabove.gif][sm=funnypostabove.gif][sm=funnypostabove.gif][sm=funnypostabove.gif][sm=happybounce.gif][sm=happybounce.gif]







Roosters A farmer buys a young rooster to impregnate his chickens. The young rooster struts into the barn and yells to the old rooster, “Get out, old man! This is my barn now!”

“Tell you what,” says the old rooster. “I’ll race you around the farm; winner gets all the chicks.”

The old rooster takes off toward the front of the house with the young rooster chasing him. The farmer takes one look at the roosters, pulls out his shotgun, and blows the young one away.

“Dammit,” says the farmer. “That’s the third gay rooster I’ve bought this month!” [/align]