- Members Post a Joke : )
heheheh
RE: - Post a Joke : )
ORIGINAL: Ripper27
How do you keep an idiot waiting?
How do you keep an idiot waiting?
How long do I have to wait
for your answer ?
Hey, I'm still here wait'in
Do you know who I am ?
You shouldn't keep me wait'in...
I think I have important things to do...
Come on, I demand an answer.....Now...
Ok, I'll keep wait'in, cause...I really want to know....
Hey, I'm still wait'in
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,576
From: wouldnt u like to know
RE: - Post a Joke : )
TEXAS Church Phone
A man in Topeka, Kansas, decided to write a book about churches around the country. He started by flying to San Francisco, and started working east from there. Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs and making notes. He spotted a golden telephone on the vestibule wall, and was intrigued with a sign that read, "$10,000 per minute."
Seeking out the pastor, he asked about the phone and the sign. The pastor answered that the golden phone is, in fact, a direct line to Heaven, and if he pays the price, he can talk directly to God.
The man thanked the pastor and continued on his way. As he continued to visit churches in Seattle, Salt Lake City, Denver, Chicago, Milwaukee, and around the United States, he found more such phones, with the same sign, and the same explanation from each pastor.
Finally, the man arrived in the great state of Texas. Upon entering a church, behold: he saw the usual golden telephone. But THIS time, the sign read: "Calls: 25 cents"!? Fascinated, the man asked to speak with the pastor.
"Reverend, I have been in cities all across the country and in each church I have found this golden telephone, and have been told it is a direct line to Heaven, and that I could use it to talk to God.... But in 20 other churches, the cost was $10,000 per minute. Your sign says 25 cents per call.
....Why is that? (I just love this part!)
The pastor, smiling benignly, replied: "Son, you're in Texas now! and it's a local call."
A man in Topeka, Kansas, decided to write a book about churches around the country. He started by flying to San Francisco, and started working east from there. Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs and making notes. He spotted a golden telephone on the vestibule wall, and was intrigued with a sign that read, "$10,000 per minute."
Seeking out the pastor, he asked about the phone and the sign. The pastor answered that the golden phone is, in fact, a direct line to Heaven, and if he pays the price, he can talk directly to God.
The man thanked the pastor and continued on his way. As he continued to visit churches in Seattle, Salt Lake City, Denver, Chicago, Milwaukee, and around the United States, he found more such phones, with the same sign, and the same explanation from each pastor.
Finally, the man arrived in the great state of Texas. Upon entering a church, behold: he saw the usual golden telephone. But THIS time, the sign read: "Calls: 25 cents"!? Fascinated, the man asked to speak with the pastor.
"Reverend, I have been in cities all across the country and in each church I have found this golden telephone, and have been told it is a direct line to Heaven, and that I could use it to talk to God.... But in 20 other churches, the cost was $10,000 per minute. Your sign says 25 cents per call.
....Why is that? (I just love this part!)
The pastor, smiling benignly, replied: "Son, you're in Texas now! and it's a local call."
Monte Of The Month -- March 2007
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,264
From: Woodstock, Ontario, Canada
RE: - Post a Joke : )
Not What You Think
A blonde goes into the dry cleaners to have her sweater cleaned. She asks the clerk, “How much?”
He doesn’t hear her correctly and says “Come again?”
She giggles and says “No…it’s just mustard this time.”[/align]
A blonde goes into the dry cleaners to have her sweater cleaned. She asks the clerk, “How much?”
He doesn’t hear her correctly and says “Come again?”
She giggles and says “No…it’s just mustard this time.”[/align]
RE: - Post a Joke : )
[align=center][/align][align=center]Ha, ha Ha, ha[/align][align=center]Good One there `Mod `Wiz'er[/align][align=center]just mustard....I'll have to tell Pres. `Bill `C that one : )[/align][align=center][/align][align=center]How long do I have to Wait ?[/align]
[/align][align=center]Ha, ha Ha, ha[/align][align=center]Good One there `Mod `Wiz'er[/align][align=center]just mustard....I'll have to tell Pres. `Bill `C that one : )[/align][align=center][/align][align=center]How long do I have to Wait ?[/align]
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,576
From: wouldnt u like to know
RE: - Post a Joke : )
A crusty old man
A crusty old man walks into the local First Baptist Church and says to the secretary, "I would like to join this damn church."
The astonished woman replies, "I beg your pardon, sir. I must have misunderstood you. What did you say?"
"Listen up, damn it. I said I want to join this damn church!"
"I'm very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this church."
The secretary leaves her desk and goes into the pastor's study to inform him of her situation. The pastor agrees that the secretary does not have to listen to that foul language. They both return to her office and the pastor asks the old geezer, "Sir, what seems to be the problem here?"
"There is no damn problem," the man says. "I just won $200 million bucks in the damn lottery and I want to join this damn church to get rid of some of this damn money. "
"I see," said the pastor. "And is this bitch giving you a hard time?"
A crusty old man walks into the local First Baptist Church and says to the secretary, "I would like to join this damn church."
The astonished woman replies, "I beg your pardon, sir. I must have misunderstood you. What did you say?"
"Listen up, damn it. I said I want to join this damn church!"
"I'm very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this church."
The secretary leaves her desk and goes into the pastor's study to inform him of her situation. The pastor agrees that the secretary does not have to listen to that foul language. They both return to her office and the pastor asks the old geezer, "Sir, what seems to be the problem here?"
"There is no damn problem," the man says. "I just won $200 million bucks in the damn lottery and I want to join this damn church to get rid of some of this damn money. "
"I see," said the pastor. "And is this bitch giving you a hard time?"