Remember a couple weeks ago when my girlfriend left me because of this illness I didn't believe she had? Well today I spoke with her and shes not doing too well. She's got a bad kidney and will be undergoing her first blood transfusion in the next month or so. Doctors told her she'll need to go through a couple. If she makes it through the first one then theres a good chance she'll pull through this. Now I'm kicking myself in the *** for not being there for her.

 

Best of luck to her and try not to beat yourself up too bad over it. My wife had so many blood transfusions over the last year, we lost track. Different disease, though.

 

From what I read blood transfusions can quickly put you to rest if not done correctly or a mistaken is done. From what it sounds like she may have Kidney Cancer?

 

There are some complications that can arise, yes. It's hard to go into the details on here, but she had to be "cross typed" at least weekly or more often even though they knew her blood type. I think there were some other things they had to check in her blood to monitor the transfusions. I believe there were some risk of infections, etc. Believe me, you'll learn all about it if you go through this with her. I can't remember it all right now.

 

Without knowing all the dynamics of your relationship with your girlfriend/ex-girlfriend, as long as she's telling you the truth, be a good friend. You can still be there for her and let her know that.

Best of luck to her man!

 

Hope everything works out well for both of you. Best thing to do would be to be there for her if she'll let you. Sounds like she would let you if she talked to you. Always good if you're at least speaking to each other.

 

The best thing you can do for her is to lend an ear when she wants to talk or blow off steam or frustration, and a shoulder to cry on if and when she needs that. If she is truly ill she isn't looking for a romantic relationship at this point. She does need good friends and follow her lead. She will let you know what she needs and wants.

 

Like others have said Just be there for her. I hope she will be alright. good luck.

 

Hi JW, It's sad to read about your former g/f. I wish she would have been honest with you & not kept secrets from you..Hopefully her doctors will be able to correct her problems with medical procedures...I do hope that you both can be HONEST with each other...To me it's the glue that holds any good relationship 2gether...I hope that you can be there for her as a honest/caring friend..

Honesty is the prime quality that brings in trust in a relationship. And, we all know that a relationship is built on trust. In other words, honesty forms a strong base for every relationship and everything else follows. Apart from this, honesty is important in a relationship for the following reasons.
Clear mind:

When you are honest you have a mind that is not cloudy with heaped up secrets. No you don’t need heaps of secrets to make your mind cloudy, a handful of them or even one secret can give enough trouble. When you are honest, you are clear and you can enjoy the accompanied happiness.
No secrets 4-Sure:

Of course, that is what being honest means. You have no secrets and you are open to your partner. You share everything and you don’t hide a thing from him/her with your knowledge. I am not saying that you give a report of each and every movement of yours, but you maintain no secrets willfully.
When your mind says that you have to keep this from telling your partner, then there is a red flag indicating dishonesty. So when you are honest you make sure that every important event, matter or anything related to you is conveyed to your partner and your partner knows well about you. This gives additional assurance to your relationship.
Stress free:

When you have no secrets to maintain, you can lead a stress free life. When you are honest in a relationship with anyone, then you do not run around hiding from your partner or your friends 4-Real. You have nothing to cover up, nothing to lie and nothing to bluff. This helps you to lead a stress free life & be happy 2 be & enjoy your `Journey of Life. Wish you both good luck....~> Be HONEST 4-Sure!

 

That's exactly what she told me last night, she just called me and gave me some more info, apparently shes got an infected kidney they'll have to remove and do blood transfusions, She's praying that it doesn't spread to her other kidney because if it does that's bad news. Doctors told her if the blood transfusions don't work shes got an expectancy of 2-10yrs to live. She said she has AB- blood so it's quite a rare blood type.

Thanks Space for that reply, I'm just glad to have her to talk to. Not having her around at all was just painful. I hope she pulls through this and if she does hopefully down the road we might be able to bring back what we had.