things not to say to a cop:
1: cop"your eyes look a little red son, you under the influence?" you"officer your eyes are kinda glazed, had a donut lately?"
2: cop " do you know how fast you were going? " you " well officer i obviously wasnt going fast enough to outrun you"


post yours:

 

Cop, "Know why I pulled you over?"
You, "I was drinking too fast?"

Cop, "Know why I pulled you over?"
You, "Dude, wanna race? We've got the same engine"
^Thought about that one several times.

 

"I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead."
AND my favorite haha....
"Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence."

man, i cant even begin to tell you how many i've heard. As pursuing to be a firefighter, in my training academy my instructors had a new one every day. the battle of cops vs. firefighters will live forever haha. a wise instructor (retired chief) once told us....
"When people wave at cops, they use 1 finger, when people wave at firefighters, they use all 5 fingers"

 

on the other hand, the cops did make a huge bust the other night that i was happy to see take place.....

 

 

I haven't raced with one, but YEARS ago, at a restaurant, I popped hoods with a state trooper. He had a Plymouth Fury with a 440 6-pack, and I had my '61 F100 with a 428 Police Interceptor. We had a good chat. I had another time when I got pulled over just to see if it was the truck that he helped build, and it was, except back then, it had a Merc' 410.

 

haha i like the huge bust one

 

" what seems to be the officer, problem?"
-or-
"please excuse me while i... SO LONG SUCKER, HAHAAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!" ( as the passlock in the monte fails & car refuses to start....)

or you could do like the guy at englishtown a couple weeks ago and head-butt an officer, no need to even open your mouth. then follow by kicking the windows out of said officers patrol car, its a GREAT way to make friends, lol

 

Officer the reason i was going so fast was becasue i dropped my beer and when i bent over to get the beer the shotgun in my lap fell and got stuck between my leg and the gas pedal.

 

Cop: Do you know how fast you were going?
You: No, the speedometer doesn't go that high.

Of course there's the classic scene from the movie, "Planes, Trains, & Automobiles":

Cop: Do you have any idea how fast you were going?
John Candy: Uh, no actually. The speedometer melted.


Something else not to say to a cop:

Yeah, I was driving like that so I could have a story to talk about on the internet. You'll be mentioned on our website!